Some people are too thick to live

YouTube meanies played a cruel trick on people stupid enough to upgrade their iPhone 7s by telling them a "secret hack" to get a headphone jack which involved drilling into the phone.

Poor battery life, tired design

While you may not be aware of it, Apple’s most expensive iPhone ever, the iPhone 7, is getting poor reviews – at least among those reviewers who take their job seriously and don't adopt the missionary position when it comes to Jobs' Mob.

Wants a data snuffler

Fruity tax-dodging cargo-cult Apple has just written a check for an Indian data snuffler called Tuplejump.

Harder to hack but still a doddle.

Despite the usual security claims from Apple that its iPhone 7 is “the best, most advanced iPhone ever” it is still a doddle to hack.

Adopts missionary position in Samsung's home ground

The fruity tax dodging cargo cult Apple has decided that it can open one of its consumer cathedrals in Samsung’s heartland.

The churn  never stops

It seems that one of three Apple chip design teams is already pretty well advanced with a design for an iPhone 8S.

Brave technology failure

Apple fanboys who wasted money “upgrading” to the iPhone 7 have been blessed with a new “feature” which turns off their controls.

Hypodermic needles

While every IT company in the entire universe appears to be hyping the internet of things (IoT) as the next big thing, there’s very little substance to the claims.

Fanboys look foward to being dragged kicking and screaming into 2016

Fruity tax dodger Apple is going to be putting AMD’s Polaris under the bonnet of its much needed iMac refresh.

You get what you pay for

When it is not hissing at customers for making it work, Apple’s new iPhone 7 is using Airplane mode as an excuse for a permanent snooze.