But good if you drop them in the loo

If you want to destroy an Apple fanboy's phone it is probably not a good idea to drop it down the loo.  All you need to do is drop it.

Measuring incredibly small objects

While the expensive new range of iPhones is about as useful as a chocolate teapot, Apple fanboys have found something they find incredibly useful.

L shaped battery phone starting at 1.149 € / $999+ tax / £999

iPhone XS and XS Max have started reaching their early adaptors, and at the same time iFixit managed to dismantle it and tell us which chips are inside of the precious overpriced phone.

Are you a committed fanboy?

Jobs’ Mob is copying China’s dystopian citizen policy which removes credits from people who don’t conform until they become third class citizens with no rights.

Remains as vapourware

Two separate reports are saying Apple's AirPower charger is vapourware due to it facing overheating issues which Jobs' Mob can't fix.

EU cancels court case

Ireland's government has fully recovered more than $16 billion in disputed taxes and interest from Apple.

To be fair,  Donald Trump also has the same problem

Apple has been slammed for creating phones which are too large to fit in the average woman or US president's hand.

Waste of engineering skills

One of the unusual things that the Tame Apple Press has not noticed about the new iPhone Range is that Jobs’ Mob appears to have lost interest in its 3D touch tech.

Go as high as €1,289/£1,099

While even the US prices of the new Apple iPhone trio were quite high for our taste, it appears that buyers from Europe or the UK will have to shell out even more cash than their US counterparts, pushing those prices to insane levels.

LCD screen, same A12 SoC, and a single 12MP camera

In addition to the iPhone Xs and Xs Max upgrades, Apple has also unveiled the much cheaper iPhone Xr, made for those that might think $999 and $1,099 is just a bit too much money for their taste. In other words,  people who don't have very much money - the cheapskates.