Reddit is a hotbed of scorn, where iPhone users rail against a voice assistant that has somehow become dumber over the years.

"I actually hate Siri with everything inside of me," groans one particularly bitter soul. Others describe the bot as worse than its 2011 debut version—a damning indictment given its age.

Job’s Mob unveiled Siri a day before Steve Jobs kicked the bucket, and while the original showing looked promising, it's since staggered through a patchy evolution plagued by missed deadlines, buggy responses, and a downright refusal to grasp even basic commands.

More than 2 billion devices have the software baked in, yet most users wish it would just go away.

Earlier this year, Apple promised a sweeping Siri revamp under its so-called "Apple Intelligence" programme—complete with ChatGPT integration and a new “personalised assistant” smart enough to sift through your texts and emails.

But that big moment has fizzled. Insiders say the company quietly admitted the rollout was “ugly and embarrassing” and stripped Scottish-born AI chief John Giannandrea of Siri responsibilities, handing the mess over to Vision Pro boss Mike Rockwell.

Earlier this month, Apple acknowledged that it could not say when the Siri overhaul would arrive, saying: “It’s going to take us longer than we thought to deliver on these features.”

The cocaine nose jobs of Wall Street aren't impressed. Apple shares have slipped 9 per cent this year—worse than the Nasdaq’s 5.5 per cent drop—while investor anxiety over Job’s Mob's AI future mounts. The failed electric car, the underwhelming Vision Pro headset, and now this AI flop point to systemic rot.

Even the faithful are rattled. Long-time Apple analyst John Gruber declared, “Something is rotten,” and other commentators draw comparisons with Microsoft’s shambolic Vista era. A false advertising lawsuit has already been filed, by customers who feel duped into buying iPhones based on vapourware promises.

Despite the chaos, Apple insists it’s working on it. But at this point, Siri might be better off joining the electric car in Cupertino’s graveyard of busted dreams.

Hacks from the Daily Telegraph asked Siri when she was going to get smarter, and she shrugged, “Sorry, I don’t understand.”