Replace 60 million lines of COBOL--yeah right  

Elon [Roman Salute] Musk is trying to modernise America’s Social Security Administration with a crack team of DOGE-linked technologists and a timeframe that makes actual engineers laugh out loud.

There are no 150-year-olds in the US

Elon [Roman Salute] Musk’s team of elite coding nerds bragged that they found fake 150-year-old people collecting Social Security in the US with their cheques illegally cashed -- however it turns out they didnn't know their COBOL.

But the code still lives on

Early software engineer and co-designer of COBOL, Jean Sammet, has died in Maryland at the age of 89.