Probably another tax dodge

The fruity cargo-cult Apple is desperately looking around for something to replace its dying iPhone cash-cow and has hired two Google satellite executives.

Despite the law suits

Shareholders in Qualcomm breathed a sigh of relief after it was revealed that the fruity cargo cult Apple had been paying some of the money it owed for royalties.

Server grade Xeon iMac arriving in Q4

According to sources within the Taiwanese supply chain, Apple is preparing to begin production on the 2017 refresh of its iMac desktop lineup in the second half of the year. The company is also testing a new server-grade iMac for enterprise users to take on Microsoft’s Surface Studio competitor.

On Sunday, several new renders purportedly showing Apple’s design for upcoming iPhone hardware this fall have appeared, and now show a device that is somewhat smaller in size than previous details leaked.

Tame Apple Press jokes fail

The Tame Apple Press has been trying to spoil the release of Galaxy S8 with lots of gags about exploding batteries. The only problem is the S8 battery tech is surprisingly robust.

Don’t hold your breath

The Tame Apple Press was over the moon this morning after it was revealed that the fruity cargo cult has got a licence to test self-driving cars.

iPad maker might go for another pile old Tosh

The fruity cargo cult Apple is thinking of dropping a billion or two for the troubled Toshiba semiconductor unit.

But still faces a stock exchange delisting risk

Toshiba Corp’s shares finally recovered this week after Japanese broadcaster NHK reported that Apple is considering a multi-billion-dollar investment into the company’s semiconductor chip business.

Can’t get it to go

The fruity tax-dodging cargo cult Apple is set to dump one of the few things that were moderately interesting in the coming iPhone 8.

Claims it was overcharged.

BlackBerry shares surged 18 per cent after the troubled phone maker won a $815 million award from Qualcomm.