News - subcat

Samsung expected to see smallest profits yet
Published in Mobiles


Smartphone cash cow is losing its Seoul

Samsung, much like its rival Apple, is finding that its smartphone cash cow is dying and the company is set to post its smallest profit growth in more than a year in the second quarter.

Really dumb hack targets terminally stupid Mac owners
Published in PC Hardware


Soft targets

Someone impersonating administrators of cryptocurrency-related discussion channels on Slack, Discord, and other social messaging platforms has been attempting to lure others into installing macOS malware.

Apple Siri intervenes in Syria debate
Published in Mobiles
Tuesday, 03 July 2018 18:02

Apple Siri intervenes in Syria debate


Hey Mr Speaker, what's an iPhone?

A UK minister was interrupted by Siri when he was making a speech in the Houses of Parliament today.

Apple plans to shove more RAM onto its new iPhone
Published in Mobiles


This one goes to XI

The fruity cargo cult Apple appears to have hired Nigel Tuffinel from Spinal Tap and decided that the next iPhone XI should go to 11 when it comes to RAM.

Apple tries to fix its maps
Published in News
Monday, 02 July 2018 11:29

Apple tries to fix its maps


But..but.. that means they were not perfect after all

Fruity cargo cult Apple has deployed a fleet of vans to fix its maps, meaning we could soon see a lot of Apple vans in lakes, living rooms, and airport runways

Apple and Samsung bury the hatchet
Published in Mobiles
Thursday, 28 June 2018 10:57

Apple and Samsung bury the hatchet


Ended the war of the rounded rectangle has

Apple's thermonuclear war against Samsung for daring to oppose it in the smartphone market – the thermonuclear war over who owned the rounded rectangle – is finally over.

Apple to close all ports
Published in Mobiles
Friday, 22 June 2018 10:27

Apple to close all ports


Because getting rid of the headphone jack was so popular

Apple thinks that giving its users less for the same or more money is a winning strategy.  Getting rid of the headphone jack meant that users had to spend cash on expensive wireless earbuds and now it wants to kill off all ports.

iPhone users left out of Europe scheme
Published in News
Thursday, 21 June 2018 15:25

iPhone users left out of Europe scheme


Use Android, UK government says

A scheme to allow European Union citizens who want to stay in the UK after the country leaves next year will exclude people who use iPhones from registering.

Apple software geniuses strike again
Published in Mobiles
Thursday, 21 June 2018 10:20

Apple software geniuses strike again


Latest update is borked

Apple's latest iOS update is so borked that the fruity cargo cult is not saying anything about it

Apple fined for bricking old iPhones down under
Published in Mobiles


Fine is probably not going to hurt

Fruity cargo cult Apple has been slapped rigorously about the chops with a wet bus ticket by an Aussie court which decided that it was wrong to brick iPhones which had been fixed at non-authorised repairers.