Apple begins mass production of M5 chip
Tame Apple Press holds its breath
Fruity Cargo cult Apple has begun mass-producing its M5 chip for its Mac series and iPad.
Intel did not know how to be foundry
Apple told TSMC
Fruity cargo cult Apple chose to cosy up with Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing Company (TSMC) over Chipzilla for its custom silicon because “Intel didn’t know how to be a foundry.”
Apple releases urgent update for buggy software
Two zero-day holes
The fruity cargo cult, Apple has stunned its user fanbase by admitting that the software it touts as more secure than Microsoft has two zero-day security flaws.
Apple releases new iPad Mini
Mostly a spec bump
Apple, the fruity cargo cult, has just released a new iPad Mini with a faster A17 Pro chip that it claims supports Apple Intelligence.
Apple tries to save sales by bringing out new models
More Macs and iPads expected
Fruity cargo cult Apple plans to rescue its falling sales figures by releasing several new models and upgrades for early next year.
Apple Pay Later arrives
Ironically late
Fruity cargo cult Apple has introduced Apple Pay Later scheme in the US, later than Jobs' Mob thought it would be.
Ex-Apple executive realises iPad is pointless
What was Jobs thinking of?
Ex-Apple executive and longtime Apple commentator Jean-Louis Gassee has suddenly woken up and realised that the iPad had no use and is dying off.
10th-generation iPad uses an old pencil
Will need to be charged seperately
In a move to show how bleeding edge it is, the fruity cargo cult is reverting back to its first generation Apple Pencil for the new 10th-generation iPad.
Apple admits iPhones, iPad and iMacs have serious security risk
Attackers could have complete control of your Coldplay and U2 collection
Fruity cargo cult Apple has admitted that its faultless, super-cool, operating system which rules across all its devices has a feature that allows a naughty person to take control of the machine.
Apple says hit the road jack to iPad
Entry-level iPad loses useful tool
Apple's upcoming entry-level iPad is rumored to cut the 3.5mm headphone jack which while being incredibly useful had been purged from Jobs' Mob's line up ages ago.